Ginger Binger!

When a rich dessert like good ol' Cheesecake calls for a crumb crust, what ingredient comes to mind? Or what about the traditional yet decadent S'more?

Really??!! Graham Crackers??.....Sigh.....Yes, you were right....but how did this Cardboard even come to be considered an edible pantry staple? And why on Mother Earth, was its weak ass paired with the lusciousness of the aforementioned desserts?

Not totally sure, but I assume it's because of how cheap it is to produce, which then allows the brand *ahem* (Nabisco) to spend most of its budget on advertising and market availability. Appealing to the busy American family seems the ticket! Parents in a hurry and the kiddos need a snack? Break 'em off some honey (flavored) crackers and they'll suffice 'til dinner (McDonald's).

Here's something to consider...the average box of name brand Graham Crackers costs $3.99 depending on if you have a coupon for it or if it's something a specific store has on special (almost always). And this is why you would be purchasing $3-4 worth of Cardboard - Nabisco Brand Honey Maid Graham Crackers <- here you'll find the ingredients and the nutrition facts. Or plentitude and lack thereof, respectively. So are you willing to shell out that much money for something that may just sit and grow more, uhm, board-like, or may even be consumed so quickly it can't really be enjoyed (and honestly, you can't ever Enjoy a Graham Cracker!). What if I told you there was something similar in nature because of its versatility, yet is so extraordinarily tasty and cheap that it deserves a spot in your pantry right now... For half the price of those crackers, you could buy yourself an eco-friendly bag of offbrand Ginger Snap Cookies! Not only do they offer some zest in any way you eat them, but their ingredients are going to be far fewer in number (which is Always something to keep in mind when you're shopping intelligently), but the sugar content is less likely to be refined because the good Ginger Snap recipes call for Molasses, which lends a darkly sweet that your tummy and taste buds will appreciate. Something even better to consider is making them yourself! These are among the simplest cookies to make from scratch because you most likely have every ingredient on hand, the instructions are very clear and Short, which of course means they are not time-consuming! Making them yourself means spending a fraction of the cost of that bag on several dozen more you can store in the freezer for later and it serves a variety of meals.

These weren't really my cup 'o tea as a child, because my grandmother made them pretty damn spicy. She was raised to make her own bread, can her own fruits and veggies, and use "her own Damn hands" to fix, make or build something without the convenience of machines or the constant presence of a man. So it's easy to guess what her pantry may have looked like; stocked to the brim with only the necessities, no frivolities. Thankfully, frivolities only included things like sugary cereals and manufactured meat and didn't include her Ginger Snaps or Cinnamon Braid Bread. When she moved in with my mom, dad and I, I was still in diapers and she became a force to be reckoned with, especially in the kitchen. She insisted that if I wanted cookies, she'd be damned if they were purchased (much to the chagrin of my father, who thoroughly enjoyed his Keeblers) and if I didn't learn my way around the kitchen by her side. Eventually, I got up the nerve to tell her why I didn't eat too many of the Snaps and so she backed-off on the spice overload and presented me with a new love of them in a milder form. Over time, I paid attention to the many (at the time, strange) ways she used those cookies; crumbs for breading pork chops, crumbs for cheesecake crust, ice cream topping, stuffing, sweet potato casserole, etc.

I didn't realize how good I had it then, but I sure do now! And boy am I grateful for the discipline and experience in that kitchen. It may have contributed to my content identity as a plucky curmudgeon and opinionated feminist, but I know it made me appreciate the things I am capable of producing with my own two hands and a bit of patience.

Now, remember how I mentioned that you'd probably have the ingredients on hand? Well, It's true. Because if you've Ever tried to make an Autumn themed dessert like Pumpkin Pie, you have the Ginger, Cloves, Nutmeg, and (of course) Cinnamon right in your cupboard. And do you know just how good these spices are for you? They're more than a little good. Ginger has pain-reducing and anti-inflammatory capabilities, and it also aids in smooth digestion. No wonder we've been told to drink Ginger Ale for a grumbly tumbly! Cinnamon not only possesses the power of reducing your LDL cholesterol, but it also improves cognitive function and memory among so many other benefits. And I'll mention now that you can always add fiber to your recipe by substituting some good ol' whole wheat flour, and apple sauce in place of butter if you like.

My point in all of this is to get you thinking outside the box when you try to balance your household needs and the money I know you're trying to hold onto if at all possible. Why not invest in the sacks of flour, the sticks of butter, the jars of preserves, and the spices to make your own treats? The overall time it will save (because you'll be storing most it to make it last) and the cost of the ingredients end up saving you mucho moola because you'll end up needing those very same things to make Other things and so on. Plus, if you have children to consider in this, won't they be more than jazzed to help Make COOKIES?! Teaching them the basics of measuring and composition means you're actually teaching them *gasp* CHEMISTRY. But for JEEBUS-sakes, don't tell Them that....just let them enjoy quality time with you and the end result of a treat...it may just develop their character and help them appreciate how special our relationship with our food really is. And don't lie, you birthed these people to be your lifelong Minions, so put them to work, dammit!

Barbara's Ginger Snaps
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup whole wheat flour
2 tsps baking soda
2 tsps ground cinnamon
2 tsps ground ginger
1 tsp ground cloves
pinch of salt
1 cup packed light brown sugar
1/4 cup molasses
3/4 cup canola oil
1 large egg
raw sugar for rolling

- Preheat oven to 375 and line baking sheets with parchment.
- Mix all dry ingredients (not the sugars) in a medium bowl
- Mix all wet ingredients and brown sugar in a separate large bowl.
- Blend dry mix into wet mix until just combined, cover and chill in fridge for 20 mins.
- Spoon out heaping teaspoon fulls and roll in sugar, place 2 inches apart on baking sheet.
- Bake for 9-10 mins because you'll want 'em crispy!
- Take 'em out and Leave 'em on the pan for several minutes to firm up then transfer to a wire rack to cool COMPLETELY! No Cheating!
- Freeze what you are not going to immediately eat/use in a ziploc. Crumble 'em up for crusts, breading, stuffing, etc. They go well with sharp flavored cheeses and fruit as a snack too!

A Case of the Cheap & Tasties

In the time between cooking, cleaning, working-out, and playing with our dogs, I've spent a few (too many) hours on Facebook, watched my favorite shows (i.e. True Blood, The Walking Dead, Paranormal State, etc.) a few (too many) times, and devoted (okay, a Lot) hours to my Kindle. Another hobby of mine is finding and managing the kinds of coupons that will apply to what we normally purchase. i'm a big fan of saving money and yet I'm not as savvy as the folks featured on TLC's 'Extreme Couponing,' though my motivation is the same. My drive to save the money we don't have to spend on mandatory bills is very strong, especially since living overseas is a pretty stark cost-of-living comparison to that which we were used to on the Mainland.

My husband works full-time as an active-duty SSgt in the USAF, and has taken on a ton more responsibility in his field since we arrived on island. His time is pretty darn precious to say the least, and since I am working towards joining, I've chosen to stay at home and do whatever I can for my goals and assist him in his. This is what has handed me so much time, so please don't mistake me for neener-neenering about my free time. It's just how it is.

As someone with a bit too much time on her hands and a drive to save as much of our income as possible, I've become something akin to a detective; a resource detective. Much as I love to get out of the house every weekend, I feel better about the time I spend at home during the week now that I've found a way to contribute, not just in terms of keeping the house tidy, the dogs and myself exercised, and the food ready. My household contribution has evolved beyond the surface-level and has helped strip me of the roiling indignation of not being able to Bring Money In (yet), and replaced it with the bubbling contentment of rediscovering my creativity, building on my knowledge base and honing my universally derived, domestic skills. The later seems to override the former doesn't it? I finally (since arriving on Guam) feel as though the independent and self-sufficient femme I am, has welcomed my current obligatory domesticity.

In my research, I feel like whatever I find should be shared at the very least, so that you can make up your own mind about what to do with it. Implement it for yourself if you like but it doesn't hurt for the knowledge to be made available for those that might not have the same kind of time to research it themselves. These are the Tales of the Cheap & Tasties...

Pantry Staples
Make Your Own Necessities
Sharp Corners of Your Money
Simple Remedies and Common Sense

Sight Seeing

Re-purposing oneself in the midst of a focused effort didn't fit so well at first. Only because it made more sense to beat myself up for what wasn't happening (though I was striving desperately to achieve) rather than shrug my shoulders and embrace the opportunities in front of me While I continue my efforts, did I allow this to happen. I am speaking of my work to join the USAF.
March of last year, I decided to join for the career opportunities, educational possibilities, and the kind of self-fulfillment one should get from serving. I had just accumulated a few challenging injuries from a car accident, so the obstacle of losing the weight I needed to, in order to join was a bit daunting to say the least.
But I did it. Well, I've lost Most of what I needed to. I started my journey near 240 lbs and I am now 184. I also completed my physical therapy after the accident, began a rigorous job at Costco and helped prepare my little family for a PCS overseas to Guam. 2010 was quite the year.
Arriving on the island was difficult for all of the issues with pets and housing and military financing, so the stress got to me. I'm not excusing my food choices during this time (I ate enough Subway to NEVER find it appealing AGAIN) since we really had no choice but to eat out for a couple weeks until we could get settled, but the stress hormones raging through me were enough to make my body go all wonky. We've basically settled into our life here on the island and I'm still working on my Last 15 lbs...Since we got here until this last week, I've been on a rollercoaster of emotion regarding my body's progress based on my workouts.
I've been yo-yoing between 187 and 183 no matter what I did. Honestly, going on 3 months of this has left me weary because my goal is 170, because that is the max weight for my height in the af.
It's always easy to tell someone else that they just need to be patient and loving with their body While they are burning calories over their intake, but for me, what was it going to take?! I just couldn't justify telling myself that!! I felt like I didn't deserve to be "taking it easy" while i worked toward this goal when the number weren't reflecting the effort. I can't say I know how many emotional jags I've been on when the scale won't reflect what measures I've taken. I know I'm not the only woman to experience this, I certainly won't be the last, but I realized something, very recently, so cliche yet so True that I decided to listen to it: It is not about the Destination, it is about the Journey. "Not all who wander are lost."
I've been so caught up in making sure I did my 'Ripped in 30' DVD or took my Green Tea Burner so many times a day or how many calories I burned versus consumed that I obviously wasn't having any fun or feeling accomplished in anything I did, and I was blind with what Isn't happening instead of what Is. I've had it all back-ass-wards and beaten myself up over it for no good reason. Noticing that my jeans fit better wasn't enough because the fucking Scale wouldn't validate me. Who said the Scale was the one to validate that anyway?? Well, the bottom line is, the military wants me at that exact weight or I don't qualify, so without me saying so, the Scale really is my validator according to the USAF.
So, how do I drop the LBS and keep my spirit alive? Well, something I needed reminding of was this: Your body responds to how you nurture your spirit.
Our bodies also respond to our thoughts and how we choose to feel which decides which chemicals start moving around through our system. And if there are too many damned stress hormones, then really, no matter how much we do, these chemical occurrences won't allow the changes to take place.
I knew it was time to let go of the number and welcome the amount of time I had, outside of exercising and working towards my goal, and use it to do the things that define my happiness such as DIY projects, old timey how-tos and marry my nutritional efforts with my love of cooking. I started researching things that piqued my interest and would put my well-rounded self to work. The whistle while you work kind!
I've stumbled upon a few websites that have harnessed my inner domestic goddess and fueled my drive to create! I've always LOVED crocheting and knitting because doing it made me feel Useful, and because we only have my husband's income at the moment, what better way to contribute to our thrifty efforts than by researching ways to cut the dollar outside of just couponing (which I already do;).
For example, on Offbeathome.com, I learned how to make my own laundry detergent! All I had to do was find the THREE ingredients and follow the instructions! And guess how much it will save? Over $100 in laundry care items over the next year or more! That's a Big Deal when you're trying to pinch pennies. Also, we've taken to growing our own food, which still takes time, but we are patient with the impact it will have on us. I'm growing and drying my own herbs, investing in locally grown, established plants. I am working out in between episodes of True Blood and The Walking Dead, while I wait for my own homemade bread to rise and cooking my own tortillas. I work on a project for my loved ones, I carefully recycle our used goods and find ways to use things like toilet paper rolls as seedling molds.
A few weeks ago, I was too absorbed in my lack of transformation and dwelling on that to notice what I had. Now, I feel accepting of the process and how truly important it is that I do the things that help me do something for myself all at once, because these actions, and the love and care I put into these things are what nourish me. I feel more in touch with my goal knowing I'm already involved and present in my life, contributing in the ways I want to and that are needed.
Doing these types of things may not be everyone's cup o' tea, but you never know what may create that little inner smile you didn't realize you needed. And when it comes to feeling like you could give up on your goals at any moment, you don't need to change goals...you may just need to let the sights on the path get your attention for a bit because they may just lead you down a more fulfilling road toward that ultimate goal. Besides, you know you are SO much more than a damn Number, so Act like it dammit!

Welcome to the Jungle

  Now that I have Axel Rose screeching in your head, my job is half way done.  Since my husband is so good at getting songs stuck in my head, I thought I'd share the experience.

  Now for the other half of my point in this.  Being so far away from the AFB and any real social areas, I am embracing the limited amount of contact I have with the outside world.  I'm not going to go exploring the jungle bordering our house yet because I feel very ill-equipped for such a venture and I doubt anyone would be able to hear me if I accidentally faced off with a FREAKING HUGE BOAR.  Our dogs seem especially willing, but if it's just me at the house for at least 10 hrs a day, I'm going to play on the cautious side of my curiosity.  Because what man wants to come home from a long day of work and commuting to find a gored wife?  That's just how I feel about that, for now.

  So currently, while I mostly try to find ways of exercising (with gravel roads, a towel for floor cushioning and a set of 8 lb dumbells as my equipment), I've picked up my crocheting A Lot, made significant progress in the Diana Gabaldon Outlander Series, picked-up this blog again, and begun crafting a multi-layered work of fiction.  Not to mention, I am trying to find fun ways of entertaining the dogs too.  I hate to see them bored and not enjoying their puppiness.

  The story I've very recently imagined is probably the most interesting and promising fictional work I've ever imagined.  My husband is an extremely talented writer so having explained this storyline to him, I was curious and a bit nervous about his reaction. Granted, his fictional interests are mostly not in line with mine, so he is not my target audience in terms of readership, but his opinion matters to me.  His interest was piqued and he identified it as having a lot of layers, which is normally something I haven't been able to outline or recognize within anything I've intended to write.  Coming from him, this felt like the praise I'd been hoping for.  It feels good to gain some confidence in that respect! 

  With these little surges of creativity, I just might pick myself up and out of the well of isolation I've felt a bit mired by.  Sure, I still want badly to meet a friend or two but I guess I was given this position for a reason and the only way around the feelings of loneliness (when Les is not around) is to embrace it.  Sometimes, that's going to be difficult, I'm going to want to fight against it, and I'm going to cry and wallow...but I think that embracing those feelings too is what will help force me out of the 'fog' and into another idea or strengthen my drive to Do something about it.

  I won't say I'm content because there's so much more I want to do with myself, but I will say that I am appreciating the progress I'm making.  In the meantime, there's weight to lose, doggies to love on, a story to write, and a man to love.

 

The Little Georgia Peach

  I didn't go to bed last night or wake up knowing what I would be writing about today.

  There were plenty of hints along the way that would eventually culminate into this scenario, but we were looking at the wrong source of those hints, until now.  It crushes my heart to know what was happening now, feeling like I could have done something...even though we've been told there wasn't anything that could have been done.

  Today, I lost a little, yet truly significant, piece of my family.  Roxie, our little orange tabby, was relieved of her deteriorating condition with my mom and grandma by her side.

  The pain is excruciating to let her go, but I would endure this pain again and again to ensure she never had to go through what she has.  Her fluxuating weight (which was too little for her already petite frame) was a sign of Kidney Failure I had no reference for... we'd thought all along that if any of our pets had limited time, it would have been Lacey, our elderly spaniel.  But Lacey is doing better than she has in a long time...one of the last things Roxie did before they took her to the vet, was curl up next to Lacey on their big, fluffy pillow and lay like that for several hours.

  Roxie was 5-years-old when I first saw her.

 Before I met her, she'd belonged to a military family who had declawed her and decided to leave her with a friend of theirs when they received another assignment, never intending to retrieve their little cat.  This friend already had two or three cats of her own, so after several months of wavering correspondence, she felt she couldn't continue to support so many cats.  The woman surrendered the little orange tabby to the local animal shelter in Valdosta, GA.

  On the same day, sometime in late November 2003, the ex and I walked into the only animal shelter we could find in that small (literal and figurative) southern town.  We had decided to get a cat because it would be a companion for me while he deployed to Iraq for several months.  He intended on finding a "tuxedo cat" and wanted it to be a kitten.  Even at the time I thought this was a rather lofty and arrogant way of approaching a pet rescue.  I was reluctant to his way of thinking because I knew that the mature animals often get overlooked...and I didn't like the possibility of Any of these animals being overlooked and then punished for it.

  I remember walking into the tiled, fluorescent lit room that held all of the cat crates and kennels.  There were a couple of kittens but they didn't at all match the "tuxedo" look he was wanting.  Most of them were a few years old, and seemed friendlly enough.  I asked the supervisor if there were more and she hesitated, saying that they had a separate area for the Newbies while they were examined in quarantine by a vet, before they were integrated with the other cats.  They were trying to prevent any infections, but were confident that the newbie they had today was in good health. 

  I rounded the corner into the adjoining room and saw the prettiest little orange tabby perched as politely as could be next to her kennel door.  She made a little chirping noise in acknowledgement and nuzzled the door bars with a quiet insistance.  I figure that most animals are particularly happy to gain some affection when they are in those circumstances, yet something caught hold of me about this cat and I wasn't going to walk away.

  The ex wasn't thrilled or even enthusiastic about my choice since I hadn't picked anything he would have, and at the time, that really upset me.  But I'd made my choice clear and had asked so many questions of the supervisor regarding this kitty, that there was no way anyone would turn me away.

  I was told to come back to finalize the adoption in a week or so, so they could be thorough in her health exams.  By that time, he would be on his way to the desert and I could spend some bonding time with her when I wasn't working.

  I adopted Roxie on December 3rd, 2003.  Over the next few months, I would get to know her as my Insistant Snuggler.  Unlike the cats I'd had back home in California (no offense to them because I will always love them too!) this kitty showed affection all the time.  The petite little peach named Roxie was all about some purrin' and nuzzlin' and always slept on my back.  During the night, she wouldn't even budge form her perch on or around me, save for me moving around in my sleep. 

  A few months after I'd adopted her, the ex and I split up and I was forced to move back home to California.  My mom flew out to help mend my broken heart with a nice long road trip, peppered with a stop at every Cracker Barrel restaurant we came across, and Patricia Cornwell and Janet Evanovich audio books to entertain us and drone out the wailings of poor Roxie in the back seat of my Malibu.

  In all of my heartbreak at the time, I still held onto the positive of having found such an awesome cat.  Of all the random places to be and to be influenced to make the decisions I did based on the events in my life, I think it's proof of some kind of .... order?  I have no idea...I just know that Roxie was meant to be in my life for the time she was (though I would give anything for more time with her) and I was meant to be in hers.

  I feel blessed for the eight, great years I had with her and I'm glad we found an even better home with the man I love and the other 'kids' we've brought into our home.  I hope she was happy in life, and I hope she's even happier where she is now...wherever that may be.

  Roxie, I've loved from the moment I met you, and I always will.  I will always smile at the memory of your endless love and affection for Les and I, and the playful warmth you always showed every other animal around you.  I miss you, my little Georgia peach.

I iz Connected

  Last week was rough, I won't sugarcoat it.  We went from living in a hotel room, which was thankfully within walking distance of restaurants, a pool, and anything we might need, to our new house.  Inspite of all its Awesomeness, the house is a little far removed from the areas we'd gotten familiar with in the short time we've been here.  Not to mention we were now a little over half an hour away from Andersen AFB, where Les now works, and where the dogs were serving their quarantine time (and then some) until we could afford to check them out and had somewhere to bring them.  There really aren't any pet-friendly hotels on the island, unfortunately.

  Once we endured the search, the scramble to file all the paperwork with Housing on base, and secure the house for moving in, we were exhausted.  Especially Les, being the provider now until I get into the USAF.  The dust settled a bit as we walked into our home, only to realize how difficult it would be to be in the house.  Without a landline or internet (and boy am I surprised at how reliant we have to be on an internet connection, since communication with family, banking, and contact information is cost-effectively exclusive to just that) I was stranded.  Feeling more than a bit isolated, more so because Les went from being around me 24/7 to gone for close to 13 hrs a day (including his commute to work and back), I was stir-crazy and self-conscious about how stir-crazy I had become in such a short period of time.  It's difficult to justify, even to yourself, that kind of shift in dynamic.

 You'd think that I would be happy to sit with my dogs in my little striped folding chair with my dogs, my kindle, and a beautiful yard to explore.  Better yet, a beach just down the drive to our house.  For the most part, I was.  The difficulty came when missing my family and lacking the capability to just call them and hear their voices was just not there.  Knowing I had no way to contact my husband or call for help if something happened scared me.  Faced with the stark knowledge of this disconnect, a crumbling building could describe me best.

  You know what makes me feel even more like a turd?  At the most 'disconntected' point, I really only had to go without like this for Thursday and part of Friday.  Yea, I feel a bit turdy.  I would never intend to make my husband feel guilty for this or anything like this, so it was hard to express myself about this to him without him feeling like it was his job to fix it.  It's just the way things were and I need to develop better coping skills because of it.

  Having had a pleasant, restful weekend with my husband and the dogs, I feel more equipped for the coming weeks.  My plan to join the military is still strong, and so my efforts will now double in order to reach my weight goal of 170 lbs within the month and develop my running endurance while studying the ASVAB.

  More of this blog will be about life here on the island as it develops for us, a bit of a journal of my efforts, and maybe a story or two.  Anecdotes galore since I am spending my days with two amazing boxers and have a little bit of time on my hands. 

Hafa Adai :)

 

Throwing Yogurt

This title could be one of the most obvious candidates for an awesome porno, so I am sorry to disappoint you that this has almost nothing to do with porn.

Yogurt became a featured part of my kitchen decor today. It wasn't really intentional but considering how pissed off I was about EVERYTHING...subconsciously, it may have been. Thankfully, our boxer, Vince came to the rescue. He made sure nearly all of it was safe and sound in his belly before I threw an absolute shitfit over the incident. Les was an absolute witness to this, just so you know. His reaction on the amused/"May I laugh at this?" scale was tipping a 9 to 10 but from the look on my face and the stream of obscenities that came pouring out of my mouth, he reigned it in. For his own safety, I'm glad he did. Though he did say, "In a few minutes, this will be hilarious."

Admittedly, a few minutes later, it was...but I wasn't laughing yet.

I will most likely be in a position to throw some vanilla fat-free yogurt some time again soon, but hopefully it will be in a more porno context. You see, I had happened to be cleaning the refrigerator after having spent a couple miserable hours at the grocery store and I was NOT a happy camper.

I'd been gearing up for this grocery trip since we ran out of milk about a week ago. I'd spent time gathering coupons from newspapers, online sources and catalogues all week, and I was determined to save us money and stick to a grocery budget. I had my calculator, my notepad, a working pen (the ones I like are hard to come by), a typed list of groceries with notes about their corresponding coupons, and a folder that held said list and all 25 of my valid manufacturer's coupons. Yes, I carry a large purse, and I also remembered to bring my reusable shopping bags. This in itself is a task and half since it's hard to keep them with you when you really really need them.

To say that I was stoked and ready for battle would be an understatement. I was ready to get what we needed and Get-the-Fuck-Out.

If anyone knows me well enough knows that I love to go grocery shopping but I would rather be Bill O'Reilly's concubine than have to deal with the Other people in the grocery store. The jackholes who leave their cart in the middle of the aisle just so they can walk all the way to the end of it and look at the different flavors of their favorite pudding off-brand. Or the gems who stand around in groups talking about their colonoscopies and refuse to let you get your can of $.50 garbanzos. They then look at You like you just shit in their milk. Yes, I will fore go all of that, please. This is why I had a gameplan and I had to stick to it, otherwise, Miranda becomes a whole 'nother person. Les can attest to this.

1.75 hrs later, I made it out of the store with my sanity hanging on by my hangnails. It was then, upon returning home (covered in elbow-check bruises and Officer wives' sweat) that I discovered there was a foul odor in wafting from the fridge as I tried to arrange our new nourishing ingredients. It was bad....

I discovered: 2-wk+ old homemade whipped cream....God-knows-how-many-months-old butterscotch instant pudding (this was the smell, and it was so strong, it could be smelled from within a tightly sealed glass container)...a homemade feta/tzatziki/cream cheese concoction probably a month old...and a moldy can of dog food....

Plus, there were still many signs of sticky Dr.Pepper residue from a month ago when Les' soda exploded. It was so bad I took everything out and scrubbed the whole inside, taking out drawers, slide-out shelves, etc. including the upper freezer. This all ended up happening Before I could chance putting in any more new groceries so I was racing the clock in terms of the refrigerated foods' shelf life.

Just as a side note...we are very clean and tidy people, so this situation was a damn disaster for me... seeing as I'm a bit OCD about cleanliness and order.

It was during this flurry of activity that I attempted to wash the Dr-Pepper off the yogurt container and it flipped out of my slippery hands and onto the already-needing a sweep-and-mop floor. I then, flipped the fucketh outeth... Why does Les always have to bear witness to all of these, my little breakdowns? I did not cry, I did not blubber, but I could have, in that moment, made a grown man cry (or at least some small children). I let Vince do his damndest, then I continued on. Country music helped, so thank you 96.9. And of course, Les set to work on the vacuuming and cleaning the bathroom, for which I am very grateful because if he hadn't taken the time to delight in my shitty meltdown and then made-up for it by helping (elsewhere) I would still be busy to this moment. And I would be a whole helluva lot angrier.

I'm in a peaceful place now...that is, until Ivy shits on the carpet again.